Critical Health Advisory.
There have been official reports of localized outbreaks of Smiles which, if left unchecked, threaten the very existence of our society. The World Health Organization has identified areas of intensified outbreaks which could conceivably grow into a Global Pandemic.
The initial symptom is unprovoked spontaneous smiling which is easily spread through human interaction. Physical contact is not necessary to expand this threat but it is a common by-product of the infection. Exposure to this condition can lead to happiness, communication, and in extreme cases, understanding, caring and love.
The potential for this condition to expand out of control is considered high due to mankind’s genetic and emotional weaknesses with respect to rejecting kindness of any sort. An especially worrisome variant of this virus could occur as a result of smiling at someone from a different social background. The results of co-mingling smiles between persons of divergent races, religions, gender identities or societal attitudes could lead to irreparable damage to our existing society.
Officials are requesting that everyone maintain vigilance with respect to maintaining isolationist living practices and by avoiding eye contact with anyone you are forced to come into contact with.